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How I Found Peace through a Solstice Ceremony

Experience submitted by Ella Klyashitsky

My husband and I had done a lot of preparation to commemorate the return of the sun on winter solstice with a spiritual ceremony. We didn’t have any friends to celebrate it with that year, but were living in such a naturally beautiful and clement environment at the time so we were still inspired to carry out the winter solstice ceremony, as given by Belsebuub, in full.

We had spent the best part of the week involved in preparations. We’d discovered a private beach that faced the sunrise and spent a few mornings there, aligning a make-shift stone circle to the rising sun and preparing a fire to light.

We expanded on our limited arts and crafts abilities, making paper-mache headdresses, painting them, as well as gathering all the needed items that would be symbolic of different forces, such as a pine tree to symbolize the eternal/evergreen Father.

Here is a description of the ceremony, including a video of it being performed in California.

With all the effort I put into preparing, a lot of attachment, in retrospect, must have grown inside me too. I wanted the ceremony to go well; I wanted the weather to be perfect and for it all to flow seamlessly. I certainly didn’t want to be late. I really dislike being late; a lot of subconscious states emerge and make me rushed and tense and angry when I’m late, or approaching the possibility of being late. No one knows this better than my husband.

A Tumultuous Drive to the Beach

The morning of the ceremony I woke up in good time and did all the last minute arrangements. The drive to the beach was just over an hour and I knew what time I wanted to leave, but we didn’t actually leave until after that. So began a knot of tension within me and a rising amount of frustration.

By the time we were on the road a cascade of emotions and thoughts had fired off inside and I was immersed in the bitterness of anger. I applied the techniques of the mystical inner transformation that I found out about from Belsebuub, and combined with focusing on the feeling of driving and seeing the colors of dawn arrive in the sky, managed to change my inner state somewhat on arriving to the location.

However, it was already light and we had to walk very fast to our circle and I certainly wasn’t totally free of my inner tension.

My husband performing the role of the divine Father during the ceremony.

Beginning Belsebuub’s Ceremony for the Winter Solstice

On arrival the sun started to rise. This should have been the pinnacle of the ceremony, with the various stages leading up to this moment. We were not even ready to start, and within me a massive tide of anger emerged.

Had I not been faced with having to perform the ceremony right then, it may easily have manifest in an upset comment and started off a series of negative exchanges between my husband and I. But now I was faced with playing the role of the divine mother, walking through the dawn of creation – she really wouldn’t behave like that!

There was no time to dwell on it, we quickly began the ceremony and I started walking in slowly decreasing circles along the arms of a swastika drawn in the sand, the ancient Hindu symbol of the universe in motion around the four solstice and equinoctial points of the year.

As I walked I prayed, I prayed to the divine mother that I was representing to remove the anger within me. As well as maintaining this inner asking, I tried to perceive the surroundings and use my senses to ground me and keep me in reality.

I felt the cool sand under my feet, heard the gentle sound of the waves, saw the expanse of the sea and cliffs around me. I also chanted the mantra OM, said to be primordial sound of creation.

I felt the anger within me fighting back, but it was very obvious and incongruous in the context of the special event. Very soon it was overpowered by the mystical energies that the ceremony itself produced and my work to remove the negative states.

By the time we had gone through all the steps and completed the ceremony, my inner state had been totally transformed and I was able to sit in peace around the fire with my husband, enjoying the beautiful setting and the feelings of consciousness.

Me representing the divine Mother for the ceremony.

For me, the speed and scale of the inner change was like nothing I’d experienced before. But it didn’t end there. What makes this experience stand out for me was that for the next few days I felt like I was surrounded by a protective shield, formed by emanations from within.

The usual daily battles to overcome petty thoughts, lower emotions and to not express anger just weren’t there. Instead I felt completely impenetrable and at peace. It’s what I imagine it would be like to be ‘hermetically sealed’; I felt what it was to be inwardly nonreactive to the telepathic and manifest communication of egos between myself and others. I could see the same things occurring that would normally give rise to irritation, but now I saw them from an observer’s distance and felt no inner ‘bite’ back.

Such was the change in my behavior that even my husband commented on it. And of course, he was very glad of it too. One of the most significant things I have gained from applying Belsebuub’s work in daily life is being able to improve the relationships I have with my family and friends, trying to base them on the qualities of the consciousness: love, compassion and good will.

In this video, Belsebuub talks about how our inner change improves the lives of those around us.

Me at the summer solstice

Something else I’ve experienced through coming to know Belsebuub’s approach to life and spirituality is feeling like I’m helped in the struggle to change by sometimes being given a glimpse of what it’s like to live without negative inner states – as was my experience on this winter solstice. This change can be through working persistently on perceiving and going against an inner state, but it can also feel like a merciful gift, that acts like an incentive and a balm.

Taking part in the ceremonies Belsebuub has created to commemorate the sun’s journey and its symbolic portrayal of the distinct stages in the path of awakening has been an incredible learning process. It has opened up a fresh understanding of spirituality and appreciation of the interconnectedness of all life, and of life and the message of awakening. As well as this, I’ve enjoyed incorporating these events as ‘punctuation marks’ in the year; as times to focus more on the spiritual and to reflect on my own inner work. Belsebuub says it’s a time that mystical experiences are more accessible – I certainly feel this to be true.

“Although the solstices and equinoxes are celestial events, they are also very personal ones. They communicate not only cosmic principles, but inner ones too, as the inner and outer worlds are connected. Each individual can have their own reasons for celebrating the solstices and equinoxes, but these celebrations give everyone participating an opportunity to experience spiritual principles directly. The spirit in life teaches – through these celebrations an individual can learn something personal about their own journey of consciousness, and a group celebrating can learn and perceive something together.” – Belsebuub and Lara Atwood, A Guide to Celebrating the Solstices and Equinoxes

Leave a reply

  • Enjoyed reading this – thanks for sharing.

    It’s interesting how the ideals we have of peace and mysticism can sometimes produce the opposite – anger, etc. – when something gets in the way of how we think things should be!

    By fighting through it, sounds like you received a lot of learning and something very powerful from the ceremony. It’s interesting how the effects stuck around afterwards.

  • Very beautiful experience Ella. That was very interesting that you experience coincided with the meaning of the winter solstice. You managed to extract the light from darkness. Very inspiring reading. Thanks

  • I loved reading this. Thank you. It was such a beautiful reminder of the power of our Divine Mother. Loved those pictures of you too 🙂

  • Thanks for putting the efforts to share your story Ella. It’s been very enjoyable and funny to read. Great to know you overcome these angry egos which most likely wanted to blame your husband 🙂

  • Hi Ella,

    Thank you for sharing this beautiful experience and photos. It was inspiring to read how you were able to take control internally and overcame those emotions and thoughts that would have completely spoiled your solstice experience otherwise. It seems having that desire to sacrifice the lower state and connecting to divine principles earned you that elevated state for the next few days.

    I also really like the quote from The Path of the Spiritual Sun you’ve included. When I first heard about the meaning of solstices and equinoxes I couldn’t see very well the value of their celebration. But actually trying to tune into that time of the year and the principles they mark has been a beautiful learning experience. It’s quite amazing to me how a celestial event can represent a stage in the spiritual work, and also how something of that advanced spiritual stage can be also communicated to me, an individual who is far from it, in the way that make it possible to receive that experience.

  • Thank you for sharing this story, Ella.

    I understand very well how you feel when you hurry to prepare some important things for a good purpose. The wondering is if these negative feelings serve this good purpose, but when you understand this bad perspective you can overcome this negative internal situation and succeed something superior.

    It’s an inspiration for me your big internal change.

  • Thanks for sharing this experience Ella. It’s amazing how quickly the transformation took place from those lower emotions to a much more peaceful state. It does show how immediate the benefits of spiritual practices and ceremonies can be and in particular, it shows the power of the divine mother, who you were praying to. You also made me laugh when you said “now I was faced with playing the role of the divine mother, walking through the dawn of creation – she really wouldn’t behave like that!”

    It’s funny how egos can hijack almost anything if we’re not careful, including spiritual celebrations. I’ve taken part in a number of solstice and equinox celebrations, but the most memorable one for me was a simple ceremony held on a beach with a group of friends. We incorporated various symbols, readings and mantras recommended by Belsebuub into the ceremony, but were just wearing our normal clothes and hadn’t spent a long time preparing it. Although I’ve found it useful to work closely with a group for some days in preparation for other ceremonies, that simple celebration on the beach was probably the most relaxed, as it was without some of the egos of anxiety, agitation, disappointment etc., which you mentioned can ruin our perception of the moment, if we become too attached to getting every detail perfect. In fact, when a guy came along shouting at his dog in the sea, it didn’t really matter, as we had already created a calm and peaceful state within ourselves.

    I agree that the discovery of the solstice and equinox celebrations through Belsebuub’s guidance has been an incredible learning process, as through participating in these ceremonies, I have gained a deeper understanding of the principles of creation and enlightenment, which I can apply to my own life. Belsebuub and Lara Atwood’s work on the path of the spiritual sun is a really unique and practical educational resource, which I feel fortunate to be able to access and explore.

  • Thanks Ella, the learning and experiences that can be had through these ceremonies and their surrounding time is amazing, there is totally ‘something in the air’ that can be tapped into.

    I can also very much relate to the pressures of trying to prepare for and have a ceremony go in a certain way. I’ve seen multiple times how, like you describe in your transformative experience, it’s possible for that inner turmoil to be turned around with the right efforts, detachment, love. And on some occasions it seems to be part of the learning actually, the darkness to overcome in order to learn and reach some light. (Although the mindset that it ‘should be’ like that is no good obviously, as it can misguide us from tuning into the new experience and learning that each solstice and equinox can bring.)

    The photos look lovely btw. A beach like that really seems like a lovely setting.

    • I agree Karim – observing and overcoming the darkness within ourselves can also be pertinent during these celebrations.

      I also agree that the photos are lovely! 🙂

  • What a beautiful experience, Ella, and it was especially nice to read this on the Winter Solstice 🙂

    I can relate A LOT to those feelings of being upset when things are running behind and I could identify with the battle you faced with the timing. And then arriving after the sun was already rising would also be a tremendous challenge to not be upset. The fact you fought against all the negativity and rose above it, getting in touch with the cosmic principles of creation, and achieved inner peace is extremely inspiring.

    I’m also glad those feelings of peace and being hermetically sealed stayed with you days after the ceremony!

  • Thanks Ella for sharing this experience. It is amazing how little effort is needed to shift things around and for that, we always get help, which makes impossible goals possible.

  • What a timely experience to share Ella 🙂 As we are just preparing for the Solstice ceremony tomorrow, doing the same things as you described before the event (just today I’ve been painting those headdresses!) It was well written too, I really enjoyed reading the honest and detailed narrative of how it all unfolded and hearing about your learning. It makes me kind of excited to see what kind of learning there might be available from this year’s winter solstice, if I can be clear enough and pay enough attention.

    I can really relate to the frustration of being late for something important, especially the equinox and solstice celebrations as they are a one time thing of the sunrise or sunset on one particular day. Unleashing my frustrations on the object seemingly making us late as a way to get rid of that obstacle, often being my husband 😮 Or managing not to unleash them externally but being in a resentful and tense mood nevertheless. And wanting to get the preparations all perfect and on time and make it go smooth I can relate to, when the important thing is to reach a quietness and perceptiveness within to be able to tune into the energies and forces present. Not make the perfect masks or headdresses but to make them with love, as humble symbols and crude representations of mystical cosmic principles. Probably the joy and the love of the preparations, of the opportunity to tune into cosmic forces and the possibility to be taught something, are more powerful than external perfection…

    I really like how you were able to overcome those aggressive inner states by trying to relate to actually being the Mother of creation, it’s such a beautiful, symbolic experience, and then being given the gift of emotional impenetrability in return. What you said about being helped by being given the experience of what it’s like without our inner states, helps me to connect the dots of some such experiences I’ve had, thanks for that insight.

    It has been amazing to celebrate the equinoxes and solstices with ceremonies created by Belsebuub, this opportunity to feel a connectedness to the universe and revive something so ancient, spiritual, mystical, beautiful in our modern lives. Just the effort of preparing properly, choosing a beautiful or even a sacred site, getting up in the early hours and showing up to see the sunrise, or the sunset, just the fact that I tried and showed up seems to give me something powerful and precious.

    Great pictures too by the way!

    • Thanks for your comments Laura – reading them the night before the ceremony really helped me to remember to find and focus on what is important.

      This year’s ceremony was actually the most peaceful I’ve yet experienced. There was no rushing or stress, despite many of us having a fair amount to organise and prepare. Though I felt twinges of the farmiliar emotions and thoughts that come up at these events, they never became powerful. Instead I was able to feel what was happening. The combined efforts of the group I feel attracted a spiritual presence and energies. It was very magical – plus there was a beautiful sunrise, which helps!

    • I agree Laura. I feel the inner efforts are what really count, even though I’ve found it’s so easy to get caught up internally due to the external preparations, external preparations that to begin with are to experience the best possible time internally anyway. 😛

      There was one solstice/equinox time where I did so much to prepare externally, but didn’t manage to overcome the inner turmoil, not even in the ceremony itself where situations only seemed to add more of a load to my inner state. It actually left me empty handed… So a very important lesson for me underlined there once again.
      At other times external preparations and such have been a lot more minimal due to circumstances for example and yet internally, surprisingly, I was able to tune into something amazing.

      I also feel very grateful to Belsebuub for giving all this information on the solstices and equinoxes, giving the opportunity to benefit from them. They’re really about the ‘coolest’ thing to happen in this century. Something real and of value that we can tap into in a high-tech-yet spiritually empty society. And yet I believe there is this something in many people, another side unexercised, not having the chance to manifest. I hope in the future many many more people will join in celebrating these times of the year and bring that side of life into their lives.

      • That’s true Karim. I feel like if I get into the mode of ‘have to prepare everything on time, schedules, how much time is there left, oh no there is not enough time, let’s squeeze everything in’ etc. I guess the mind trying to hijack it and make it into a project where I have to be efficient and finish everything perfectly, I don’t have enough energy and attention then to focus on the spiritual aspect, or it feels secondary. Then when the event arrives I’m still in this waiting and preparing mode, and it’s like a jolt to realize it’s here now and it would have been the time now to use that spiritual focus and inner silence I could have developed the days running up to it. Then it’s like what you said, leaving empty handed.

        This year’s winter solstice was a bit like that… but fortunately I realized this in the beginning of the ceremony and didn’t like it, so I made as much effort as I could to really tune into it and understand what it means and feel it, and it did bring results fortunately and I got some insights out of it and a peaceful, focused inner state. The amazing location we had high on the mountains, a perfect sunrise, everyone in our group focusing on it in a peaceful way really helped too. Although there have been times when it was just me and my husband with minimal preparation and bad weather but it gave me something too.

      • I’ve also felt like I’ve come away ’empty handed’ from these ceremonies many times Karim, and partly as I have a sense of the beauty and teachings that can be tapped into with them. But I haven’t yet wanted to give up, or to be less ambitious because of falling short! Though sometimes it may only be possible to do something simple, I feel like for me the answer is to give them more time, attention and preparation and partly this feels like a way to show my gratitude and respect for them. It reminds me a bit of getting ready for a school play – you need to put in the time and practise to be able to go in to the performance confidently and to enjoy it.

        I was remembering today that the first ‘spiritual’ book I got was partly because of the picture on the front of a young man with a white robe in nature, tending to an alter with a candle and incense. From that book I got a sense of connecting to the divine through nature, on these ‘power days’, and that spiritual ceremonies can be used to give thanks to the divine, help us built a connection to them, and the mystical energies of nature, not just for some kind of ‘magic’. I was amazed when Belsebuub started to give the solstice and equinox ceremonies; he brought so much more depth to this simple practise I had sensed held something wonderful within, but which has often been reduced when used without full knowledge of their meaning. To perform these ceremonies seems so natural, something that humans have been doing in some form for thousands of years, yet something that, as you say, we are now totally divorced from in our high-tech society. I also really hope that many others, and I myself, can reconnect to the spiritual meaning of the solstices and equinoxes, as well as nature itself.

  • Thanks for sharing Ella, sounds like a beautiful journey to the sunrise within! 🙂 I can actually relate to what you mentioned about even the several following days being transformed after this kind of inner victory. I had experienced this too, interestingly also after overcoming a major emotion of frustration and anger with the technique I learned on Belsebuub’s courses. Looks like anger is one of the major thieves of peace!


Author Belsebuub
Image © Mark Pritchard
Mark Pritchard (Belsebuub) is a British-born spiritual teacher and author who explains that every person has their own unique spiritual aspect... Read more here.

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