• Search

Encountering My Mom’s Personality

Mike L
Experience submitted by Mike L

This was a rather short experience, but still a significant one for me as it allowed me to gain a glimpse of the process of death.

Back at Home

It was nighttime and I was in the spare bedroom of the house where I grew up, stepping out into the hallway. My parents’ room was adjacent and I could hear what sounded like a woman’s voice talking on the radio.

The volume was very low and I continued walking down the hall, not wanting to disturb anyone. In the back of my mind, I thought that my mom must have been listening to the radio in the middle of the night (my dad could sleep through just about anything).

Very slowly a few things dawned upon me… Why am I in this house? I live in a different city now and the house was recently sold to another family… Oh! This must be the astral!

Upon realizing that I was actually in the astral plane, having become self-aware in my dream state, I continued to hear the talking and I listened more intently.

It wasn’t the radio after all; it was my mom talking, or maybe whispering. Maybe she was speaking to my dad, I thought?

Then I reached a more fundamental realization: my mom had passed away… almost a year before!

From Belsebuub’s description of death, I learned that the psyche splits into different parts, some which move on in the great journey of existence (like the consciousness, or essence of a person), and others that slowly fade away (like the personality – also called a ghost).

It had been a while since my mom’s passing and I didn’t expect her to be fully there with her consciousness, but I was curious as to what would happen if I were to go in and to speak to her. I turned around and walked to my parents’ room.

Stepping into the Bedroom

I walked into the bedroom. There was a light on by the bedside, but the room also seemed to have its own astral-lighting. My mom was lying alone on the side of the bed nearest the window, where she normally did.

My Parents' Room
My Parents’ Room

I’m not sure if it was a result of my lacking awareness at the time or perhaps the process of her personality fading over time, maybe both, but it was very hard to see her clearly.

She was there, but she didn’t have a well-defined form – she was kind of blurry.

She was very happy to see me, and asked me how I was doing. We spoke for a few moments but the conversation didn’t make a lot of sense and by this time, I am quite sure that my awareness was fading.

Then I awoke some 3000 km or so away in my bed.

  • Thank you for sharing this Mike. And I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ve never consciously met the personality of someone who has passed away, but I would dream quite often of my dad after he died. And somehow it didn’t seem like the real him, especially since I’ve had dreams that did seem real, with much deeper interactions. Where he knew he had died.

    I also thought I felt my mom around the house after she passed away, and also my dad later on. Or maybe I was imagining it, seeing them in my mind’s eye, walking the places they had so often walked. And yet the house felt full of…something. At times I thought I heard footsteps on the stairs while I was living alone.

    Anyway, thought it was quite brave of you to walk into that bedroom 🙂

    • Perhaps in those dreams where he knew he had died, you were communicating with his essence and not just a personality? Those sound like very special dreams.

      I wonder what my mom would say if it was really her and she knew that she had died…

      Sounds like you were very sensitive to those different energies in the house. From my perspective, I think hearing footsteps in the house when living alone and not running away is brave! 🙂

      • Yes, that’s what I felt. That it was the “real” him and not just his personality. There were only two dreams like that. But I still remember them well 🙂

  • Wow what an experience Mike, it must have been important for you to experience it. I’m also sorry to hear about your mother passing away, it can be very hard time for everyone seeing someone they love move on.

    When my father passed away many years ago now, I was fortunate to have found the spiritual works of Belsebuub and it was a big help for me in accepting his death and also in perceiving a reality about that moment. When I saw my father’s body lying not long after he had passed away, I could see and feel that my father was not there anymore and what I was seeing was like his shell, and his poor body had been afflicted with much illness and it showed me the effects that our ego states have upon the body, and it made me sad to see that. I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, I would have loved to have thanked him for all that he had done for me and my family. It makes me realise how much we fail to appreciate the people in our life and the learning we are given through the relationships we have with one another.

    Thanks for sharing your experience and your learning Mike, especially your last two paragraphs. 🙂

    • Thank you for your comments, Layla, and for sharing your experience with your father’s passing.

      Your observations are very deep and invite a lot of reflection.

      It’s such a tragedy that, owing to the egos, we don’t get to fully appreciate our relationships with other people, nor to thank them for the role they served in our lives, providing us with lots of love, learning, and opportunities. Lots to think about there…

      • I agree Mike. It is something of a tragedy. Sometimes, because I know I am unable to communicate clearly with some people, I try to speak to their essence from mine telepathically. I feel as though something must transmit, and this way I also feel I am able to satisfy the need to say thank you, or apologise, or to say the things that I might wish to say should they pass away or if there was a ‘clear line’ between us. Recently, I went through a difficult situation with a family member, where we were trying to discuss a sensitive subject over a period of time; I felt we couldn’t quite find a real contact and knew that some obstacles were from the egos, and some things just couldn’t be said. So I wrote them a letter to compose my thoughts, as though they might read it, but knowing that they wouldn’t. The process felt like it WAS a communication and actually after that, I thought I could sense a deeper harmony between us – probably this was in part coming from my sense of resolution.
        Anyway, thank you for sharing. A valuable glimpse into the reality of life and death.

  • Thanks Mike for sharing your experience.
    I am very grateful for the work of Belsebuub which can help me through life’s challenges and comprehend what really is being shown without the confusion of egos in my emotions or thoughts. Hopefully we can all build upon our experiences in order to gain more insight into our own being.

  • Thank you for sharing this experience. Your multiple mentions of lack of awareness stood out most to me. On some occasions I distinctly felt sadness for my lack of awareness with loved ones. This often happened on when I visited on a trip, or people visited me.

    This feeling stayed with me for a long time and is still here today. It allows me to see how important awareness is to human experience.

    • Hi Aleks,

      I can really relate to the general remorse for lack of awareness in the different situations in life. I wish I could be more aware with my family, friends, or colleagues. To think we’re only here for such a short time, we should be making the most of it, for ourselves and for others.

  • I definately agree Mike these kind of experiences are precious because of the learning about life and death. I don’t remember something similar but I had similar feelings being at funerals at the past. Even I don’t want to go any more, this memory and knowledge is coming up there. OBEs is definately a better way to approach it.

    Thanks for sharing your story!

  • I’m sorry to hear about you having lost your mother Mike.

    I can see how this experience can bring mixed feelings. But it seems the information Belsebuub gives has been helpful to put a context to it. And you also seemed to have gained some understandings from the experience.

  • That’s a really interesting experience, Mike. Some of the things you mentioned (especially in your last para) were quite interesting to read as many years ago I had a somewhat similar experience while having a conversation with a friend who passed away about a year before. At that time I wasn’t yet familiar with Belsebuub’s work and found elements of the experience confusing, but I recall when later reading some of the information in Belsebuub’s books regarding ghosts and the deceased, many elements of that encounter with my friend suddenly became clear to me.

    • I bet that was shocking to have that sort of experience without some guidance on the matter beforehand! That would certainly be the sort of thing that would lead one to search for answers…

  • Very interesting and touching, thank you for sharing this personal experience Mike. I liked how you described your gradual realisations of what was going on, at first realising that house had already been sold and therefore you must be in the astral, and then realising that you are actually hearing your mother’s ghost.

    From my perspective, it was very courageous of you to just go and check on your mom, as when I was in the same situation, I was afraid to see my dad despite the fact that his personality/ghost at that time was very fresh, just a day or 2 after his death, and so I would have been able to see him quite clearly I guess.
    So well done on the courage! It is also interesting that even after a year since her death, her astral counterpart was still quite defined, even though you could not quite see her clearly.

    I also remember encountering my grandmother in my dreams quite often after her death (we were quite close), and while at first she reminded of herself, gradually she changed and didn’t even look like her anymore, even though we also talked some mechanical things when I met her in those dreams. Also the meetings always took place in her house (that has in the physical world been demolished by the company that bought the property), which makes me wonder if buildings/places also keep existing in the astral plane after their physical counterpart has been destroyed, and only gradually fade…

    As everyone else mentioned, losing someone so close is nevery easy, but these kinds of experiences sometimes help to put things into perspective. I also wish we could all meet with the real sparks of our loved ones, their consciousness, and to maybe see what they are up to now. 🙂

    Wishing you many more insightful experiences!

    • That’s a really interesting thought. I wonder if buildings continue to exist in the astral after they are gone here… Or maybe we can go into records of them, much like the Akashic records for all past events? In my case, I found it odd that my mom was on the bed but presumably the other family would have completely redone the bedroom.

      Me, too, i wish it were possible (or commonplace, at least) to meet the essence of lost loved ones after their passing. A personality is just not the same 🙂

  • Thanks for sharing Mike.

    I can see why there would be mixed feelings as well. And you are right about the importance of our consciousness and the need to be more
    aware throughout our day so we can take advantage while out of body in the astral.

  • Hi Mike,
    I’m really sorry to hear about your mum’s passing – saying goodbye to someone we love so dearly is never easy.. And I can imagine that this experience would have definitely brought up some mixed feelings. It seems though that it was able to give you an even deeper understanding about what the nature of consciousness, its primordial importance and what we leave behind when our time comes. It must not have been easy at all to go through, but thank you for sharing as your reflection toward the end gave me a lot to reflect back on. Best wishes!

    • Yes, Geraldine, it certainly has given me a lot to reflect upon. Just the fact that my mom’s personality was “recognizably” my mom, despite not having an essence at the time, makes me reflect a lot upon who I am and the people i interact with. So much of what we encounter is nothing more than the personality, hiding the true essence within (or it might not even be seen due to all the egos).

      • That’s a very good point Mike – how much of what we know as a person is something eternal, and how much of it is just a temporary sum of different qualities that only exist for one lifetime?

  • I’m sorry to hear you lost your mom Mike, but it’s nice that you were able to experience some kind of contact with an aspect of her. I can imagine that the experience would have brought mixed feelings for you, as you mentioned. I think if I had the same encounter, I would be feeling happiness, sadness, wonder and disappointment at the same time.

    I think that losing someone close can bring a lot of cause for personal reflection, as it puts the preciousness of life in a new perpective. There is so much to learn about the process of life and death.

    • Truly, there is so much to learn about life and death. It makes me very grateful for the chances and opportunities I have now.


Belsebuub is a British-born author who writes about out-of-body and other types of mystical experiences. He withdrew from public life in 2010. Read more here.

More Experience Sites

More experiences with Belsebuub's work:
- Out-of-Body Experiences
- Self-Discovery
- Dream Guidance

Read more about this series of sites here.